Sunday we had amazing church service. It was unlike most church services because Pastor Chris didn't preach, much. He showed a piece of what's going on in Kansas City at IHOP (International House of Prayer) called the awakening. There's been revival breaking out there, people getting set free from bitterness, unforgiveness, sin, people getting healed and restored. If you want, you can watch live or look up archives: http://www.ihop.org/Publisher/Article.aspx?ID=1000058181
Alan, a teacher/preacher at IHOP was sharing how the awakening started on the clip Pastor Chris played at church on Sunday. It started with the revelation that we have been worshiping demonic alters at our mirrors! They said that we stand in front of our mirrors and listen to the voice in our head, that sounds like us that says, you are too fat, too skinny, too ugly, too short, too tall, you need to change this, you need to work out, your eyes are too small, too close together, too far apart. All these things we hear every day and we affirm them all day as we embody them and agree with them. These are not things that God says about us, but we choose to believe them anyway. We choose to believe them instead of what God says about us and when we agree with the liar we allow him to torment us. We live tormented by eating disorders, cutting ourselves, and the need to look like the model that hates herself and shoots heroin everyday to make the pain go away.
God tells us that we are lovely, we are wonderfully made. That He didn't make any mistakes when he created us. But because we are believing all these things about ourselves and we don't believe God, we are not being healed of our physical infirmities because we hate our body! We hate our bodies that we are asking God to fix. We want healing from colds, the flu, cancer, heart problems, diabetes, but we are cursing ourselves and allowing these inflictions to be in our bodies.
After this there was an outpouring of repentance and brokenness in KC in the students and healings started, restoration started. Many people's lives have been changed. So on Sunday God brought me to my knees and I started weeping because of the hatred I have felt towards myself and how I felt rejected as a little child. I remember my mother telling me when I was a little girl that she had me because she thought that it would save her marriage. When I was three my parents got divorced and I started believing the lie that I didn't work, that I was born to save my parents marriage and I was a failure. I felt from the very core of my soul that I wasn't worth anything, that I was a failure, that I was a mistake. During my weeping, my husband started praying over me and I felt this cloud of oppression start to lift off of me and I saw this vision in my spirit of the Lord wanting me to be a crown for His glory and it filled my heart with His love and acceptance. It was truly amazing!!